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soga16Lately, I’ve been so focused on science that I’ve almost forgotten what it’s like to watch a random, silly video or simply waste time. I think I’ve grown unaccustomed to it. In a way, this feels like something good: I spend about 50% of my day away from electronics, and the other 50% researching and writing for my blog. And I am certain that I will keep writing more from now on.
This is only my first day, and we already have so many texts here. I have no idea whether this fast pace is just because I’m starting out and have a lot to say (and that, eventually, my writing rhythm will slow down), or if, just in case, I’m simply someone who overthinks everything. Will this blog ever be abandoned at some point in my life? I don’t think so, because it won’t be only about science. I also plan to post a bit about my daily routine and my personal tastes.
For example, right now I’m lying in my bed, under the blankets, writing this late at night (11:40 p.m.). All because I can’t sleep—I keep wanting to write more and more. I feel like I need to get things out of my system, and I am very restless. I’m glad I picked up this habit so quickly, and I truly hope that writing continues to be a hobby for me (maybe writing a little every day will help).
One of my few problems with this is that I have too much fun talking about scientific topics, studying cases, and reading books. In general, I get lost very easily and end up not finishing my projects, nor paying much attention at school (which is definitely not recommended), especially since I’m currently in my first year of high school. Next year, I’ll be entering a technical high school focused on chemistry (unfortunately, they don’t accept first-year students, only second-year ones). This means I only have this year to finish my personal projects—such as, yes, a biology and genetic mutation project in which I attempt to prove that superhumans could exist. You’ll see this project on my blog eventually… if I gather the courage to finish it. Procrastination is still one of my weaknesses.
This Monday (tomorrow), I believe I’ll have my first private chemistry lesson after school (my classes end at 4:00 p.m.). I’ll arrive home tired, but happy—after all, chemistry is a subject I urgently need to start studying if I want to pursue a career in biomedicine. I was a bit sad when I realized that getting into a good university isn’t just about knowing medicine or having scientific curiosity. Apparently, you also need to know general subjects like history, geography, and mathematics—subjects I completely despise. It’s ironic, because just a few years ago I was surprisingly good at history, and it was my favorite subject. My interest in science only truly appeared halfway through my ninth year of school.
Of course, I’ve always been curious and already had some unusual habits, but my love for science is not something very old.
Sometimes this makes me wonder: is this permanent, or just another hyperfocus? I don’t think it’s temporary. I’m not that focused to the point of an extreme obsession—it’s simply something I genuinely love and want to grow closer to. No one knows the pleasure I feel when discovering new things and reading interesting books.
Among my interests are general medicine—I love diseases and everything related to ancient medicine. I’m not particularly fond of clinical, office-based medicine, but rather of medical discoveries themselves. I know many historical physicians and feel a strong passion for them. As is already expected from this blog and my previous posts, I love learning about historical figures in science (just not physics… yet). I do intend to study them more—it’s another subject that interests me.
It’s not that I dislike physics. In truth, I enjoy theoretical physics. I can openly say that I’m terrible at practical, school-level physics problems and that I would never pursue a degree in physics. What fascinates me are questions about the universe, spacetime, and reality. These topics deeply intrigue me, and I intend to study them further. That said, I still carry my good old hatred for mathematics and calculations. I hate this subject. I tolerate calculations in science and chemistry because I enjoy the disciplines themselves, but I genuinely cannot understand a mathematics teacher who truly enjoys teaching math and actually chose to major in it.
Like—
why?
You had so many options, and you chose that…
Tragic.
Before wanting to work in biomedicine, as I mentioned earlier, my dream was to become a history professor. I truly liked—and still like—the subject, just not as intensely as before. I wouldn’t say it was my ultimate dream, but it was certainly something I was likely to pursue, teaching at universities.
People are confusing, and I’m no exception. I’ve had so many dreams that the same question always returns: is science just another one of them? I don’t think so—but who knows what the future holds? Just a few days ago, I wanted to study pharmacy. And a few years ago, my dream was to open a café in France.
Look at that—who would have thought that the future scientist once chose cooking? Yes, it’s a hobby of mine. I really enjoy cooking, and it makes me feel complete. I’ve even taken about two courses—both abandoned, unfortunately, due to my constant laziness in attending classes. Perhaps I’m not meant to turn my hobbies into professions. All my hobbies are mediocre, and I don’t blame myself for that—after all, they’re hobbies. I hate putting effort into things that aren’t worth my time.
I’m someone with very limited energy. If I dedicate my mental and physical energy to turning a hobby into a profession, what energy would remain for something I will actually use in life to earn a living?
Anyway, for the curious, here is a list of all my dreams from sixth grade until now:
Chef
Owning a café in France
Professional goalkeeper
Piano teacher / pianist
University history professor
Theater (preferably abroad)
Cinema
Photographer
Psychologist
Hospital psychologist
Child educator / babysitter / caregiver
Pharmacist
Pharmaceutical researcher and university professor
Biomedical scientist (current dream)
Yes… that’s a lot. They’re probably not in chronological order, but seeing all these dreams together in one place is madness. I’d like to explain each one briefly:
Chef / café in France: self-explanatory. I genuinely enjoy cooking, and when I didn’t yet have a clear dream, I would always say I wanted to own a café—especially in France, which I consider one of the most beautiful and gastronomically rich places in the world.
Professional goalkeeper: a short-lived madness that came after the World Cup. I watched the players and realized I wasn’t in love with football itself, but with the act of defending the goal. Impressive. I’ve never liked being in the spotlight anyway.
Piano and history teacher: both are similar. I enjoy piano and history for very similar—if not identical—reasons. So why teaching? The answer is simple: my love for teaching comes from my mother, who is a teacher, and from my older brother, who is also a teacher (believe it or not, of history). This connects to my next dream…
Child educator / caregiver: I love children—any of them. I enjoy caring for them and their innocence. I always wanted to work as a babysitter, but when I tried to find a job, I discovered they wouldn’t accept minors (obviously). I learned that if I studied pedagogy, I could work with children. The idea stayed with me for a long time and only faded when I found other interests. Otherwise, I might be caring for babies today.
Theater / cinema / photography: all three share similar stories. I’m an artistic person. I love drawing, watching films and series—I enjoy everything about the arts. When I discovered degrees in these areas, I fell in love with them. The only reason I gave them up was realizing that my country doesn’t value art as much as it should. And my dream of traveling the world wouldn’t be complete if I pursued those degrees.
Hospital / clinical psychologist: easily one of my biggest dreams. Originally, I planned to study psychology, possibly specializing in hospital psychology, because I truly enjoy that side of medicine and hospitals. My plan was to open a clinic or work in a hospital, and during vacations, travel the world—another lifelong dream. I remember sitting on my mother’s bed and telling her I was afraid of studying pharmacy and that I loved psychology. I almost chose psychology—it was very close. I still love the subject and promised myself that one day I’d study it purely for learning, without professional obligations.
What ultimately pushed me toward pharmacy was my mother. I love science and pharmacy (my interest even started because of Shinobu Kocho), but I’ve always leaned toward the humanities and always found them easier. Science was never my strong suit. I stood at the edge of a cliff between:
a moderate love, but great ease, for psychology
an overwhelming love for science, but great difficulty studying it
My mother encouraged me to study what I loved. She convinced me that both degrees would be difficult, and that science only felt hard because I had never studied the basics or truly tried to engage with it.
She was right.
When I began studying biology, enjoying books, and turning my hobbies into academic interests, I realized that science can be easy. I still have a lot to study, but I know now that it isn’t impossible. Psychology has become more distant—not unloved, but no longer as intense as before.
The rest of my dreams were simply small shifts within the scientific field. I initially chose pharmacy because it was broad, but today I realize that diseases and everything surrounding biomedicine fascinate me. In fact, I was very torn between biochemistry and biomedicine.
This was a bit about my dreams and how my life has been moving around them. I realize I should learn to write about just one subject—I noticed how much I changed focus halfway through this text. Anyway, I think that’s it. Until the next entry.
This is only my first day, and we already have so many texts here. I have no idea whether this fast pace is just because I’m starting out and have a lot to say (and that, eventually, my writing rhythm will slow down), or if, just in case, I’m simply someone who overthinks everything. Will this blog ever be abandoned at some point in my life? I don’t think so, because it won’t be only about science. I also plan to post a bit about my daily routine and my personal tastes.
For example, right now I’m lying in my bed, under the blankets, writing this late at night (11:40 p.m.). All because I can’t sleep—I keep wanting to write more and more. I feel like I need to get things out of my system, and I am very restless. I’m glad I picked up this habit so quickly, and I truly hope that writing continues to be a hobby for me (maybe writing a little every day will help).
One of my few problems with this is that I have too much fun talking about scientific topics, studying cases, and reading books. In general, I get lost very easily and end up not finishing my projects, nor paying much attention at school (which is definitely not recommended), especially since I’m currently in my first year of high school. Next year, I’ll be entering a technical high school focused on chemistry (unfortunately, they don’t accept first-year students, only second-year ones). This means I only have this year to finish my personal projects—such as, yes, a biology and genetic mutation project in which I attempt to prove that superhumans could exist. You’ll see this project on my blog eventually… if I gather the courage to finish it. Procrastination is still one of my weaknesses.
This Monday (tomorrow), I believe I’ll have my first private chemistry lesson after school (my classes end at 4:00 p.m.). I’ll arrive home tired, but happy—after all, chemistry is a subject I urgently need to start studying if I want to pursue a career in biomedicine. I was a bit sad when I realized that getting into a good university isn’t just about knowing medicine or having scientific curiosity. Apparently, you also need to know general subjects like history, geography, and mathematics—subjects I completely despise. It’s ironic, because just a few years ago I was surprisingly good at history, and it was my favorite subject. My interest in science only truly appeared halfway through my ninth year of school.
Of course, I’ve always been curious and already had some unusual habits, but my love for science is not something very old.
Sometimes this makes me wonder: is this permanent, or just another hyperfocus? I don’t think it’s temporary. I’m not that focused to the point of an extreme obsession—it’s simply something I genuinely love and want to grow closer to. No one knows the pleasure I feel when discovering new things and reading interesting books.
Among my interests are general medicine—I love diseases and everything related to ancient medicine. I’m not particularly fond of clinical, office-based medicine, but rather of medical discoveries themselves. I know many historical physicians and feel a strong passion for them. As is already expected from this blog and my previous posts, I love learning about historical figures in science (just not physics… yet). I do intend to study them more—it’s another subject that interests me.
It’s not that I dislike physics. In truth, I enjoy theoretical physics. I can openly say that I’m terrible at practical, school-level physics problems and that I would never pursue a degree in physics. What fascinates me are questions about the universe, spacetime, and reality. These topics deeply intrigue me, and I intend to study them further. That said, I still carry my good old hatred for mathematics and calculations. I hate this subject. I tolerate calculations in science and chemistry because I enjoy the disciplines themselves, but I genuinely cannot understand a mathematics teacher who truly enjoys teaching math and actually chose to major in it.
Like—
why?
You had so many options, and you chose that…
Tragic.
Before wanting to work in biomedicine, as I mentioned earlier, my dream was to become a history professor. I truly liked—and still like—the subject, just not as intensely as before. I wouldn’t say it was my ultimate dream, but it was certainly something I was likely to pursue, teaching at universities.
People are confusing, and I’m no exception. I’ve had so many dreams that the same question always returns: is science just another one of them? I don’t think so—but who knows what the future holds? Just a few days ago, I wanted to study pharmacy. And a few years ago, my dream was to open a café in France.
Look at that—who would have thought that the future scientist once chose cooking? Yes, it’s a hobby of mine. I really enjoy cooking, and it makes me feel complete. I’ve even taken about two courses—both abandoned, unfortunately, due to my constant laziness in attending classes. Perhaps I’m not meant to turn my hobbies into professions. All my hobbies are mediocre, and I don’t blame myself for that—after all, they’re hobbies. I hate putting effort into things that aren’t worth my time.
I’m someone with very limited energy. If I dedicate my mental and physical energy to turning a hobby into a profession, what energy would remain for something I will actually use in life to earn a living?
Anyway, for the curious, here is a list of all my dreams from sixth grade until now:
Chef
Owning a café in France
Professional goalkeeper
Piano teacher / pianist
University history professor
Theater (preferably abroad)
Cinema
Photographer
Psychologist
Hospital psychologist
Child educator / babysitter / caregiver
Pharmacist
Pharmaceutical researcher and university professor
Biomedical scientist (current dream)
Yes… that’s a lot. They’re probably not in chronological order, but seeing all these dreams together in one place is madness. I’d like to explain each one briefly:
Chef / café in France: self-explanatory. I genuinely enjoy cooking, and when I didn’t yet have a clear dream, I would always say I wanted to own a café—especially in France, which I consider one of the most beautiful and gastronomically rich places in the world.
Professional goalkeeper: a short-lived madness that came after the World Cup. I watched the players and realized I wasn’t in love with football itself, but with the act of defending the goal. Impressive. I’ve never liked being in the spotlight anyway.
Piano and history teacher: both are similar. I enjoy piano and history for very similar—if not identical—reasons. So why teaching? The answer is simple: my love for teaching comes from my mother, who is a teacher, and from my older brother, who is also a teacher (believe it or not, of history). This connects to my next dream…
Child educator / caregiver: I love children—any of them. I enjoy caring for them and their innocence. I always wanted to work as a babysitter, but when I tried to find a job, I discovered they wouldn’t accept minors (obviously). I learned that if I studied pedagogy, I could work with children. The idea stayed with me for a long time and only faded when I found other interests. Otherwise, I might be caring for babies today.
Theater / cinema / photography: all three share similar stories. I’m an artistic person. I love drawing, watching films and series—I enjoy everything about the arts. When I discovered degrees in these areas, I fell in love with them. The only reason I gave them up was realizing that my country doesn’t value art as much as it should. And my dream of traveling the world wouldn’t be complete if I pursued those degrees.
Hospital / clinical psychologist: easily one of my biggest dreams. Originally, I planned to study psychology, possibly specializing in hospital psychology, because I truly enjoy that side of medicine and hospitals. My plan was to open a clinic or work in a hospital, and during vacations, travel the world—another lifelong dream. I remember sitting on my mother’s bed and telling her I was afraid of studying pharmacy and that I loved psychology. I almost chose psychology—it was very close. I still love the subject and promised myself that one day I’d study it purely for learning, without professional obligations.
What ultimately pushed me toward pharmacy was my mother. I love science and pharmacy (my interest even started because of Shinobu Kocho), but I’ve always leaned toward the humanities and always found them easier. Science was never my strong suit. I stood at the edge of a cliff between:
a moderate love, but great ease, for psychology
an overwhelming love for science, but great difficulty studying it
My mother encouraged me to study what I loved. She convinced me that both degrees would be difficult, and that science only felt hard because I had never studied the basics or truly tried to engage with it.
She was right.
When I began studying biology, enjoying books, and turning my hobbies into academic interests, I realized that science can be easy. I still have a lot to study, but I know now that it isn’t impossible. Psychology has become more distant—not unloved, but no longer as intense as before.
The rest of my dreams were simply small shifts within the scientific field. I initially chose pharmacy because it was broad, but today I realize that diseases and everything surrounding biomedicine fascinate me. In fact, I was very torn between biochemistry and biomedicine.
This was a bit about my dreams and how my life has been moving around them. I realize I should learn to write about just one subject—I noticed how much I changed focus halfway through this text. Anyway, I think that’s it. Until the next entry.
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12/2/26 01:37 (UTC)